Some LGBT parents are sensitive about being outed in the communities in which their families reside. Fathers Dave and David Bocanegra, however, have grown accustomed to being outed on a regular basis. Their 4-year-old daughter Dahlia very proudly tells everyone she meets, “I have two daddies!”
“Despite living in Utah,” said Dave, “we have actually been treated very well in our community. My husband volunteers at our daughter’s school every week and her teacher even added same-sex parents to the classroom discussion about families.”
David Taylor-Bocanegra, 38, works as the office manager of a Salt Lake City hospital. His husband, David Bocanegra, 39, is a registered nurse. To mark their 15th anniversary, the couple flew to California to be legally married. Their path to parenthood together, however, was a roller coaster ride of emotions.
Dave and David used to have many long talks about whether or not they would have children.
“One day,” said Dave, “David and I were talking about where we were in our lives and whether or not children would be possible. I remember crying because I had come to the conclusion that having a child might never happen for us. God must have heard me, because we got a call the very next day that completely changed our lives.”
Dave’s life-long friend had called them to tell them she just learned that she was pregnant. After years of being told she could no longer have children, she was totally surprised by this pregnancy. As a single mom with two teenage boys, she felt unprepared to raise the child herself and asked Dave and David if they would adopt the baby.
“That’s the 100 percent truth,” exclaimed Dave, “but the adoption was rocky, because even though the mother knew it would be hard to raise another kid on her own, the decision was a difficult one to live with. It was especially hard when she found out the sex of the baby, because she had always wanted a girl.”
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